Take a drink

I think I'll wait.

Bad sex

But not midget porn... That shit is off the hook!

George Brownridge satisfied 15 women today!

They were all VERY exhausted...

Beef: Coming from behind

Nothing like some sexy cow ass...

Parts of me are pretty awesome...

Jack Daniels can make up for a LOT.

A very erect cake

I'm not sure if that's frosting...

Well, I guess that means I have lots of lube...

I love friction between two people. Church is going to be fun!

How often do you come?

I'd rather talk about that in confession...

Power glove handjob

I want one for each hand. I'm dead serious.

Got Milk?

Moo.

We'll sell your house or....

What if I don't have a house to sell? Is there another deal we can work out here?

Remember my name...

I scream it even when I don't remember it... You're THAT good.

What are these strawberries doing on my nipples?!

I have the same question GOOGLE... And where the hell is the whipped cream?

Lick a phallic rock

All you women ever think about is penises...

I see redcoats!

The British are cumming!

Want some bananas and cream?

That's not whipped cream, by the way...

Army S&M

Maybe "don't ask, don't tell" was better...

Asians are always so good with computers!

At least he kept his shoes and socks on.

Merry Christmas Baby!

I wanted to surprise you with something sexy...

Showgirls!

I like the ones with genital warts on their faces.